“But you didn’t make heart-shaped pancakes for breakfast! You have done that every Valentine’s Day since I was little.”
My adolescent daughter looked up at me with sad eyes.
I had completely forgotten.
Truth be told, I had completely forgotten a lot of other things too.
I couldn’t remember my daily routine.
I couldn’t remember what I did for fun.
I couldn’t remember the last time I laughed.
My mother had died just weeks earlier. After being at her bedside as much as I could but being away from my own home for many weeks, I returned to my family in a fog.
That morning, my daughter’s words jolted me. And they pulled me back into life—my life. I loved my family. I loved making breakfast for my kids every morning. I loved leaving them silly cards with their heart-shaped pancakes on Valentine’s Day.
Annalisa’s words helped me see through the fog—just a crack. My fog did not disappear instantly that morning. Grief has its own timeline. But my daughter’s truthful words that morning helped me make a start back into my life.
Many of you, I know, have grieved losses. You have felt the heavy cloak of fog on your brain and heart. Some of you live in this place today.
How did a friend or family member speak words to you that helped you begin to heal? Or, for those of you grieving now, what words do you wish a family member or friend would speak to you?